The Courage To Do Nothing

Solitude is the place of purification. - Martin Buber

The best thinking has been done in solitude. The worst has been done in turmoil. - Thomas A. Edison

I was reviewing someone’s reading list the other day and noted that the titles were themed around the 10 steps to this, the 5 steps to that and that all of his books were wired around action.

He and I discussed how the world lacked courage to do things and he indicated that by being constantly busy, he was demonstrating to the Universe that he had the courage necessary for success.

I replied by asking him if he ever had the courage to stop, do nothing and just be.  He paused, his brow furrowed and as he did so, I could tell that an answer to my question wasn’t coming easily for him.

In a text he sent me this morning, he’s still stuck on the question.

Those of us who are ultra type A spend our days learning, sharing, thinking (sometimes grinding), giving, expressing, creating (sometimes destroying) and executing but I believe that too often, we don’t take enough time for just being.

We receive thousands of emails daily / weekly from people who need help, advice, guidance or a connection to someone else we know.  We are bombarded with information and requests and in the cacophony that accompanies the activity that we are blessed to experience, we often neglect the greatest gift that all of us have been provided with – the gift that is the unique combination of our mental, physical, emotional and Spiritual selves.

And while a steady diet of knowledge acquisition and sharing matters, the cerebral part of our brain is not the only part of us that needs nourishment and rejuvenation.

Daring to do nothing

On the heels of an insane schedule that I have been told by people who know such things is not sustainable by mere mortals, I will be leaving the Earth as of Friday.

Well … not literally of course unless the line from the Styx song Come Sail Away is true.

I thought that they were angels but to my surprise
They climbed aboard their starship and headed for the skies

Many of us gauge our sense of self, our sense of value, our sense of worth, our sense of contribution and our sense of growth by how much we can accomplish in a day, how many people we can talk to, how many reports we can produce, how many Tweets we can make, how many Facebook likes we receive, etc.

I don’t.

On Friday, I will leave all my electronics at home and disappear for a few days.  Only one person will know where I am for the purposes of emergency contact.  If you attempt to reach me in any form, you will receive a polite notice that I cannot be found anywhere.

I’m taking four books with me:

• The Maxwell Leadership Bible – to reflect upon leadership
• The Stewardship Bible – to reflect upon service
• Spiritual Classics: Selected Readings on the Twelve Spiritual Disciplines – for Spiritual nourishment and inspiration from some of the greatest Spiritual thinkers who ever lived
• A Course in Miracles – for reflection on Spirit versus ego

They will be printed on paper and not in e-book format - I’m not taking electronics, remember?  There will be no books or papers on strategy, business, politics or technology – the worlds I live in about 20 hours a day, 7 days a week.

And of course, I will have my journal with LOTS of room for writing.

For three days, I will not know what the world is doing nor will I care. That being said, don’t blow it up while I am gone.  The world will not know what I am doing either which suits me just fine!  Please don’t ask others on social media if I have died just because I am not publicly visible (people have done this in the past).

I will read, write, reflect and contemplate but most importantly I will just be.

The Bottom Line

Henri Nouwen recognized the value of solitude when he wrote:

Solitude is very different from a 'time-out' from our busy lives. Solitude is the very ground from which community grows. Whenever we pray alone, study, read, write, or simply spend quiet time away from the places where we interact with each other directly, we are potentially opened for a deeper intimacy with each other.

I hear lots of people talk about the courage necessary to do this, that or the other thing.

That may be so but I think for the busy, engaged mind, sometimes it takes even more courage to stop doing and start being.

And maybe, just maybe, by doing nothing you are actually accomplishing much more than you realize.

What do you think?

The Bottom Bottom Line

Do you have the courage to unplug from the world for a few days?

Do you believe the world can survive without you during that time?

Do you believe that you can survive without the world during that time?

Do you believe that you know so much that a few days of solitude would offer little of value or substance?

Are you sure?

How do you know?

In service and servanthood,

Harry

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Addendum – The Result - June 8, 2014

When one takes time to go from meeting overload ….

…. calendar overload ….

…. communication overload …..

…. and social media overload ….

…. to nature overload (click on the image for a larger version) ….

…. I am reminded of a spa’s advertising poster that I once saw in NYC where they noted:

Come in feeling like a dominatrix and leave feeling like Mother Teresa.

Well … the gender is wrong but the transformational effect this weekend was the same.

By the way, the flower in the picture is one inch tall from the ground to the top of the flower and there was only one there that I could see.

There’s also a metaphor contained within the photo.

Can you see it?

PS Thanks for not blowing up the world while I was gone.  It was also refreshing to relearn that the world and I were both able to live without each other for a little while without significant damage to either.

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Keep the Noise Down, I’m Thinking

Silence is a source of great strength. - Lao Tzu

Silence is a true friend who never betrays. – Confucius

Some years ago at a leadership development seminar I attended, the attendees were paired up to perform an intriguing exercise.

In the exercise, one of the pair describes a real problem that they have.  The other half of the duo listens.  They are not allowed to comment on what they hear.  They are not allowed to ask questions nor are they allowed to attempt to solve the problem being described.  They are also not permitted to gesture or react in any way to what they hear.

They are told to listen and to potentially learn what Marcus Tullius Cicero meant when he wrote:

Silence is one of the great arts of conversation.

The participants in the exercise learn quickly that it is practically impossible for us to keep quiet when someone else is talking.

Yes, it is true that most of us were raised to help others when we can.  However, I found it to be an interesting demonstration of how our ego needs to solve everything that it perceives around us even if it doesn’t really know the answer or hasn’t even been asked to solve the problem.  When someone has a problem, we automatically have a solution and are very quick to vocalize it.  After all, as many of us know, it is much easier (and fun) to solve someone else’s problems rather than our own.

With the introduction of social media, this need for all of us to solve everyone’s problems or to express an opinion about them has become much more apparent and much more irresistible … and sometimes much less respectful.

As someone in the public eye, as a strategy guy, as someone who vigorously challenges those who usurp the rights of others through ignorance, greed or incompetence (especially under the guise of leadership or expertise) and as someone who embraces the ideals as expressed in Proverbs 31:8 where it is noted

"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; defend the rights of all those who have nothing.”

I also find the need to respond to events to be irresistible. After all, it is what passionate “fixers” do automatically. :-)

However, those of us who respond to many things sometimes find that we are dragged into responding to anything whether or not it is in alignment with the reason we walk this Earth.

As a result, it seems that we are constantly proving William S. Burroughs right when he notes:

Silence is only frightening to people who are compulsively verbalizing.

What matters

The ability to unplug matters.

The ability to be silent matters.

The ability to silently observe, absorb, discard, contemplate, reflect and cleanse matters.

As a tested and confirmed near-hyperthymesiac (a person with a superior autobiographical memory), I find that the cleansing that comes from quiet observation and reflection to be a valuable exercise to flush the brain of unnecessary “stuff”.

It is a practice that I practice on a regular basis and one that I strongly recommend for anyone whose vocation, passion or hobby calls for them to be constantly “talking” in any form.

Sometimes when we are doing all the talking, we forget how to listen.

And so begins my semi-regular retreat from social media and making public comments using it.  I take as long as I need.  Sometimes it’s a weekend.  A few years ago, I disappeared from the public eye (not counting clients, family and close friends) for 8 weeks and had to resurface to explain to people that I hadn’t died when rumors started to circulate. :-)

All that being said ……

The politicians as well the incompetent, the greedy and the selfish who espouse their brilliance under the guise of “leadership” get a small reprieve.

But don’t worry.

I’m still watching. :-)

And I will be back soon.

In the meantime, when I say “Keep the noise down, I’m thinking”, I’m not talking to you.

I’m talking to myself. :-)

In service and servanthood,

Harry