tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.comments2024-03-09T12:07:16.989-07:00Harry Tucker - Observations and MusingsHarry Tuckerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comBlogger939125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-15166956256863429072024-03-09T12:06:44.170-07:002024-03-09T12:06:44.170-07:00Thank you, Harry, for your brave and powerful mess...Thank you, Harry, for your brave and powerful message that reminds so many of us that we are all connected, that we need each other to live healthy and meaningful lives. Peace to you. Diane Dreherhttps://www.dianedreher.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-64652650797243743722024-03-09T11:57:33.187-07:002024-03-09T11:57:33.187-07:00Harry ... it has been my pleasure to know you over...Harry ... it has been my pleasure to know you over the years. Some of your story hits home to me as well. I chuckled at your saying you were small as a child, given you tower over me. I didn't suffer the kind of bullying you did ... but I was a well flower, no one knew I existed.<br /><br />You know that I am a Christian, and so the basis for my thoughts may be at odds given your experience. However, in just times like this, I would counsel a revisit. Not of institutionalized religion, but of a personal faith and walk with God.<br /><br />I say this because I too came to a point where suicide seemed the best alternative. My marriage of 25 years came to a sudden end through an unfaithful spouse. Yet at 70, I finally have peace in myself and my Lord.<br />I live alone 100 yards from the beach, and am content.<br /><br />Take care my friend.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-60397427057581384052024-03-09T09:50:11.779-07:002024-03-09T09:50:11.779-07:00Harry, my friend, well written. It hits all that i...Harry, my friend, well written. It hits all that is recently happening with me also. We men are so afraid to show the vulnerable side. Thank you for sharing this. Darren McDonaldnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-39392774080211993822024-03-09T01:20:04.540-07:002024-03-09T01:20:04.540-07:00Harry, it takes incredible courage to pull yoursel...Harry, it takes incredible courage to pull yourself back from the edge like that, and I am so happy that you found the strength to reach out for help. You are an inspiration, and the world is a much better place with you here. Even through your immense pain, you are still thinking of others and wanting to help God bless you Harry. I’m thinking of you today. I hope you find peace and comfort. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-27642170092749994062024-03-08T22:35:07.821-07:002024-03-08T22:35:07.821-07:00What an excellent article, Harry. Your personal sh...What an excellent article, Harry. Your personal sharing is an inspiration. You give us permission to share our own challenges and flaws and invite us to be more vulnerable so we can uplift ourselves and others. We are all on a journey and journeys are meant to be shared.Leonard Szymczaknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-24698936815787768272024-03-08T20:58:57.136-07:002024-03-08T20:58:57.136-07:00Very well written. This is true for women as well...Very well written. This is true for women as well Harry. I have been four years trying to feel better both mentally and pnysically. Ivy AAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-3398095397209091362017-11-10T08:19:44.324-07:002017-11-10T08:19:44.324-07:00Thanks for your kind note, D.
I am sorry to hear ...Thanks for your kind note, D.<br /><br />I am sorry to hear that you were caught up in this. A lot of people, including females MHAS, have texted and emailed similar stories to me, being on the receiving end of harassment or witnessing it. <br /><br />Curiously enough, some female MHAs are in fact the instigators or have discovered that they can leverage harassment for their own gain. That aspect is particularly disturbing.<br /><br />Government in the end is inhabited by humans and thus inherit the same strengths and weaknesses as present anywhere else.<br /><br />As for Mr. Joyce and Premier Ball, they both appear to have made choices that have hurt people and will hurt people. I don't agree with their choices but someone more important than I will be the judge of their actions.<br /><br />Getting women to come forward has ALWAYS been a problem (as is the case with getting any whistleblower to come forward). The first person out of the gate has no support, stands to be vilified / humiliated / punished, etc. It is not fair but unfortunately, I don't see that part of humanity changing.<br /><br />As to my list, I cannot reveal it to you but I sense that with you being in the government at some point, your guesses are "likely" accurate.<br /><br />Take care and create a great day - I hope you find the justice you deserve, for yourself and for other victims of predators.<br /><br />Harry<br />Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-9630294929369978522017-11-10T08:10:59.565-07:002017-11-10T08:10:59.565-07:00Thanks, R.
Organizations need to be cognizant of ...Thanks, R.<br /><br />Organizations need to be cognizant of the impact that ONE person can have regarding the public persona of their organization.<br /><br />As for the response to my blog, corporate apologized but I was told that an apology from the clinic where the incident occurred, if any, would depend on how busy the clinic is (intriguing - apologies from me are issued immediately and without excuse for delay). <br /><br />To date, I haven't heard a peep from them (months later).<br /><br />One must be careful when insulting a champion of an organization - also an important lesson here.<br /><br />Thanks for your note - create a great day!<br /><br />HarryHarry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-59385829410947081682017-11-09T11:31:11.045-07:002017-11-09T11:31:11.045-07:00Mr. Tucker,
I have worked inside and outside of t...Mr. Tucker,<br /><br />I have worked inside and outside of the NL government for many years and have felt the sting of being sexually intimidated by a number of individuals, including current Ministers such as Mr. Joyce.<br /><br />The problem I have is that if I report it, I will likely never get a job in this province again and I need the money.<br /><br />The other problem is that I know other women with the same issue.<br /><br />No one wants to be first to come forward and no one wants to leave this problem to fester and so we appear to have an unsolvable problem.<br /><br />So my question to you is what do we do about this and how can we make a safe environment where we can report people without fear of revenge against us? The government who makes the rules don't seem to think that the rules apply to them which in my mind makes for an unsolvable problem.<br /><br />Even things like Premier Ball and his 7 year girlfriend (this is not a big secret around here), while none of my business, makes for an environment that is disrespectful to woman (like his wife).<br /><br />I don't care who these people sleep with but I do have a big issue with disrespect to women in all forms and would like to see it addressed in a real way.<br /><br />BTW, we spent some time here in the office trying to figure out who the different mystery people are in your post. The diaper man had this fetish in university. Its not a big secret around here. We think we know who everyone is. If we send you the list, can you confirm them? :)<br /><br />Sincerely,<br /><br />DAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-64190144770327749752017-11-09T11:19:19.194-07:002017-11-09T11:19:19.194-07:00This was an insightful read - thank you for the co...This was an insightful read - thank you for the courage to share it. I had a similar experience when I donated blood in the Calgary clinic over the summer. A Chinese woman who screened me took offense to some of the piercings I had and told me that real men aren't pierced. My wife was angry and told me not to go back and so I am left with wondering if I should go back to save lives or if I will be harrassed some more.<br /><br />I wasn't sure if writing Canadian Blood Services was worth the effort. Did they ever respond to this blog post and if so, what did they say? Did they apologize?<br /><br />Thanks for the courage in sharing this.<br /><br />R.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-86168313690274026552017-10-19T06:45:42.189-06:002017-10-19T06:45:42.189-06:00I Will! I Will! Craig G. Lewishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12053393550046470421noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-86700474993607134192017-08-08T09:51:43.645-06:002017-08-08T09:51:43.645-06:00Thank you for this thoughtful set of questions, Na...Thank you for this thoughtful set of questions, Nathan. I have decided that a response was worthy of an addendum which you will note above. <br /><br />Create a great day, Nathan!Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-58124029090716261212017-08-07T08:03:38.585-06:002017-08-07T08:03:38.585-06:00Thanks for the insightful post, Harry. I was inte...Thanks for the insightful post, Harry. I was interested in your experiment from reading about it in your previous post. You mentioned what other people's negative reactions were. Were there any positive reactions (other than the one's from your team)? Also, do you think the nail polish had the intended effect of being a counter balance to your "alpha maleness"? Was this beneficial to decisions you made and interactions you had with others? Did your team members have any interesting experiences with it themselves?Nathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01845099334101892183noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-81330373635988411402017-08-04T15:59:15.994-06:002017-08-04T15:59:15.994-06:00Ouch :-)Ouch :-)Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-12075090063427636552017-08-04T12:43:07.765-06:002017-08-04T12:43:07.765-06:00Prod, Prod, Prod.
Prod, Prod, Prod. <br />Leonard Szymczakhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08893729795403461221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-70412632700598902992017-08-01T10:48:44.436-06:002017-08-01T10:48:44.436-06:00My dear friend,
Thank you for such kind comments....My dear friend,<br /><br />Thank you for such kind comments. People like you are the role model I strive to emulate.<br /><br />As for the book, I may need some prodding. :-)<br /><br />Create a great day, Leonard - keep inspiring us the way you do.<br /><br />HarryHarry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-69028465768913142912017-08-01T10:40:53.549-06:002017-08-01T10:40:53.549-06:00Harry, Your blogs are always entertaining, inspiri...Harry, Your blogs are always entertaining, inspiring, educational and a bit edgy. Never would have seen you with a pink thumb nail. But you love to stretch the world and I love that about you. Keep stretching us so we can be the change we want to see in the world. AND get your book out with a collection of your blogs!! The cover of the book could show your pink thumbnail!Leonard Szymczakhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08893729795403461221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-48588470601824415992017-07-30T18:50:41.957-06:002017-07-30T18:50:41.957-06:00There should be a "love it" button here....There should be a "love it" button here. Irishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14156837690151604143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-6154693344868183982017-07-30T18:49:35.946-06:002017-07-30T18:49:35.946-06:00There should be a "like" button here. :-...There should be a "like" button here. :-) Irishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14156837690151604143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-49553060057102579742017-07-17T11:19:27.860-06:002017-07-17T11:19:27.860-06:00I do have a follow-on question for you, John.
Wha...I do have a follow-on question for you, John.<br /><br />What do you stand up for and what are you willing to do to stand up for it? :-)Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-23483795001784585912017-07-17T10:44:40.471-06:002017-07-17T10:44:40.471-06:00Thanks for your kind words and for taking the time...Thanks for your kind words and for taking the time to respond, John.<br /><br />As for this piece speaking to my biases, we are all a collection of biases. If what I or you do doesn't speak to our biases, we could be accused of being broken or inhuman. :-)<br /><br />I don't admonish, threaten or insult others. However, when I am insulted or intimidated, I choose at that moment how to deal with the situation. Sometimes I defuse, sometimes I deflect and sometimes a stronger action is required. As a human being with the same flaws and weaknesses of other human beings, I make the best choices I can at the moment based on the circumstances, the context and such.<br /><br />I do NOT accept people who are willing to hurt others for their own personal gain. What this lawyer was offering created that potential - deliberately. I made a choice to not accept it and to express my opinion strongly.<br /><br />Curiously, your point that my behavior appears to be judgemental of the lawyer becomes a self-referential point in that you judge me in turn. I made a choice to stand up against immoral and unethical behavior. I would do the same if confronted with it again. People who are allowed to continue their behavior believe that their behavior is "not that bad". <br /><br />As for the subjectivity of character, values, ethics, respect and higher standards, I agree 100% with you. However, the offer for me to sleep with a woman in order to close a deal crosses the lines of most people - myself included. Some things extend beyond subjective analysis or personal perspective.<br /><br />As for compassion (or lack of) to accept people's differences, you are making this observation with little data or context for my day-to-day routine, in service to the people I work with, in service to my family and in service to those who need a hand-up, whether they be the homeless, the disenfranchised, the battered or those who believe they have no voice. I would caution you against making such judgement in absence of this data. Private email me and I would be happy to give you some context - a public description would be seen as bragging by some.<br /><br />As for the lawyer, he won't slander my character. I have the evidence that would destroy his practice. As for adjusting his behavior, perhaps if more of us stood up to people like him, he would be forced to CORRECT his behavior and not just adjust it!<br /><br />I appreciate this interaction, John. I always welcome differences of opinion when delivered respectfully (which you did).<br /><br />The ability to experience respectful discourse is important. :-)<br /><br />Create a great day, John.<br /><br />HarryHarry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-855857976473156612017-07-17T10:12:39.863-06:002017-07-17T10:12:39.863-06:00You write very well. I was impressed on how you a...You write very well. I was impressed on how you articulated the issues of software development in the article: Software–Complex Solutions to Simple Problems.<br /><br />This article is interesting in that it speaks to your beliefs and biases. You seem trustworthy; however, I have concerns that this trust only extends to those you feel deserve your respect -- everyone else is admonished, threatened, and insulted.<br /><br />I'm unsure why you believe your behaviour was better than the lawyers? The lawyer didn't intend to insult you, but you didn't recognize this. Why did you need to express any self-rightiousness at all? Why did you not simply bid your farewells when you recognized the lawyer wasn't up to your standards? What where you trying to prove?<br /><br />Character, values, ethics, respect and higher standards are all personal, cultural, and religious matters that are very subjective. Society isn't falling apart, it's always been this way; it just has more media exposure now (I debate whether this is good for us).<br /><br />I don't agree with the lawyers behaviour. I'm also not sure if I could trust that you have the compassion to accept peoples differences.<br /><br />There is always consequence to our actions; and I believe it's the best, and only teacher. The consequence to the lawyer was that he lost your business. The consequence to your behaviour is that he may (unjustifiably) slander your character, or maybe simply adjust his business negotiation tactics.<br /><br />I'd suggest just walking away next time with a simple "thanks for coming, we'll let you know if we're interested"; however, the choice is always yours.<br /><br />Please continue to eloquently express your opinions...without impositions :-)<br />Johnnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-61382846417039263732017-06-05T16:27:47.202-06:002017-06-05T16:27:47.202-06:00You're welcome - I think. :-)You're welcome - I think. :-)Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-30983122565969521802017-06-05T16:07:20.788-06:002017-06-05T16:07:20.788-06:00Thank you for your kind words, Kathleen. The wisd...Thank you for your kind words, Kathleen. The wisdom you share is VERY true.<br /><br />Now ... considering how important it is, why don't we live more this way?<br /><br />Is it possible that our fear-based / ego-based way of living is crowding everything else out?<br /><br />Create a great day, Kathleen!Harry Tuckerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10329922320940535781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1005196875375123554.post-63721130715292297472017-06-05T15:58:59.335-06:002017-06-05T15:58:59.335-06:00I started to write about the difference between an...I started to write about the difference between an apology and a true change of heart, sometimes called repentance. I thought about the difference between forgiveness and accepting an apology. They are different. I thought about apology-acceptance and repentance-forgiveness as transactions and what it means to forgive when there is no repentance. Certainly we can't accept an apology which has not been offered. Anyway, I started to writing about these things and decided that it would be about enough material to fill an hour lecture. Never mind. Thanks for the food for thought!Doug Picirillohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03581447386213753959noreply@blogger.com